Vicky Kaushal Calls Being Nice 'Overrated' - Here's Why Authenticity Matters More
Bollywood actor Vicky Kaushal has made a surprising statement about social behavior. He believes being nice has become overrated in today's world. The actor shared his thoughts during a recent interview with WeTheYuva.
"Being nice is a little too overrated. Not everybody should be nice," Vicky Kaushal said clearly. He emphasized that people should not stop being themselves in their quest to appear agreeable. "But it's very important that everybody stays real," the actor added.
The Problem With Excessive Niceness
According to Vicky Kaushal, the bigger issue today is that people are not being authentic. They present versions of themselves that seek external validation rather than expressing their true feelings.
Perception therapist Vivek Vashist explains this phenomenon in detail. "Being nice is often not an act of genuine will but a response trained by society," Vashist says. He describes niceness as a social construct that rewards conformity and politeness over authenticity.
From childhood, we learn that being agreeable means being good. This conditioning becomes second nature over time. What we call niceness often becomes a way to keep peace, avoid discomfort, and protect an image that feels acceptable to others.
Niceness as a Coping Mechanism
When examined closely, niceness serves as a coping mechanism according to Vashist. "It allows a person to bypass messiness, conflict, or emotional exposure," he explains. The behavior continues as long as the situation does not directly affect the individual.
The moment something personal is at stake, the façade often slips. This shows that the niceness was not rooted in inner conviction but in social maintenance. Niceness also reflects one's sense of control. A person who feels emotionally balanced can choose to respond with calm and care.
Someone who is psychologically, emotionally, or physically deprived struggles to do the same. Just as hunger makes one irritable, emotional depletion makes niceness fragile. "True calm comes from self-regulation, not image control," Vashist adds.
Suppressing Emotions in the Name of Being Nice
Emotions are not disturbances to be controlled according to the expert. They are mirrors that show us where we stand in our growth. Vashist explains this concept clearly.
"Anger points to where we are still wounded, fear signals the edge of our ambition, and grief shows what we are still holding on to," he says. Each emotion carries intelligence. When we suppress them under the idea of being nice, we disconnect from this inner compass.
Being nice often becomes a social performance. It is a learned behavior that values peace over truth. This keeps relationships and images intact but quietly erases authenticity.
"When anger, sadness, or vulnerability are hidden behind politeness, they don't disappear. They only lose oxygen," Vashist elaborates. These unexpressed emotions stay alive beneath the surface. They get stored in the body, particularly in the muscles and tissues that hold memory.
Over time, the body becomes the dam for what the mind refuses to feel. Suppression might seem like strength, but it is survival in disguise. It leads to emotional numbness, chronic tension, and psychosomatic pain over time. True calm is not born from control. It comes from allowing movement without judgment.
Healthy Ways to Express Our Real Emotions
Healthy emotional expression begins with understanding that emotions are not who we are, but what we experience. Vashist outlines practical steps for authentic emotional expression.
The first step is to trace where the emotion is coming from. Most reactions are not born in the moment. They are triggered by something that already lives within us.
The second step is to name what you feel accurately. Language shapes awareness. Saying "I am angry" makes anger your identity. Saying "I am feeling anger" separates you from it. This gives the emotion form without giving it control.
This distance creates space for reflection. It allows you to listen to what the emotion is trying to communicate. Anger might be saying, "My boundary was crossed." Sadness might be saying, "I have lost something I cared for." Naming gives emotion language, and language gives it movement.
Third, it's not wrong to feel unwell; it's wrong to deny it. Authentic expression begins with acceptance. Pretending everything is fine keeps the emotion trapped. Acknowledging discomfort without dramatising it releases pressure.
Saying "I'm not okay right now" or "This is heavy for me" turns emotion into truth instead of performance. Vashist concludes that emotional authenticity requires practice but leads to healthier relationships with ourselves and others.
Vicky Kaushal's comments highlight a growing conversation about authenticity in modern society. As people navigate social expectations, experts suggest that being real might matter more than being agreeable in the long run.
