Neetu Kapoor Opens Up About Her Marital Fights with Rishi Kapoor
Late actor Rishi Kapoor and Neetu Kapoor were one of Bollywood's most beloved couples. They tied the knot in 1980 when Rishi was 28 and Neetu was 22. Despite being at the peak of their careers, Neetu stepped away from films after marriage to focus on family. Their marriage lasted four decades until Rishi's death in 2020.
In a recent interview on Soha Ali Khan's podcast, Neetu, joined by her daughter Riddhima Kapoor Sahni, opened up about the dynamics of her marriage. She revealed that despite her generally calm nature, Rishi was the only person she constantly fought with. "I used to only fight with my husband. My husband and I used to fight for months," she said.
Describing Rishi as strong-minded, Neetu shared that disagreements often turned into prolonged periods of silence because he would not easily listen to her point of view. She would resort to giving him the cold shoulder until he eventually initiated a conversation. "I used to go on this cold war and the cold war could go on for a month, six months. I would not bend till the time he didn't ask me, 'What's your problem?' And he would do that," she recalled with a smile. Neetu added that during those phases, Rishi would reach out to their children, Ranbir Kapoor and Riddhima Kapoor Sahni, to understand her mood.
"And then he would say, 'Acha bata yaar, kya hai? What's your problem? Let's sort it out.' I would say, now that you have come to me, now, you listen to me. Because otherwise, he would just not listen," she said.
She also remembered her mother-in-law joking about their long silent spells. "So when I would tell people that I have been married for 30 or 40 years, my mother-in-law would say, 'You are only married for 20 years because you haven't spoken for 10 years'," she shared.
Neetu further revealed that after every reconciliation, she would encourage Rishi to follow a healthier lifestyle, including dieting and exercising, and he would briefly comply before slipping back into old habits. "He would do everything because he wanted to be the good boy because he just made up after 6 months. But then again, he would fall back to his old ways," she said, adding that the older generation of the Kapoor family never believed in fitness routines or dieting.
Reflecting on their relationship, Neetu shared that she met Rishi when she was just 14 or 15 years old and essentially grew up alongside him. She admitted feeling intimidated by him because he introduced her to a world she had never experienced before. "I got involved with him when I was 14-15, so I kind of grew up with him. He took me out, he showed me the world. He would take me to discotheques. He taught me how to have wine and all. I had not seen the world. Maybe, I was very intimidated by him and I would always try to make him happy," she said.
Neetu also revealed how emotionally invested she was in Rishi's career. Whenever one of his films underperformed, she would pray, fast, and visit religious places hoping for his success because she couldn't bear to see him upset. "When his films didn't work, I would do all these fasts, go to temples, gurudwaras, and churches. I don't know how many novenas I must have done in my life so his film works. I couldn't see him upset, unhappy. That was my life and it was a very innocent life. Today, when I look back, I see that I was really innocent. I just went through life the way it came," she shared.
Neetu Kapoor on Changing Marital Dynamics
Speaking about changing relationships in modern times, Neetu observed that the institution of marriage is gradually declining due to changing social dynamics and financial independence. "You don't need to be married to have kids," she said, adding, "So, the institution of marriage is going down." She also pointed out that people being financially independent changes the nature of relationships today.
During the conversation, Neetu clarified that she always encouraged her daughter Riddhima to work and dismissed the long-standing perception that Rishi Kapoor stopped her from pursuing films. "I always encouraged Riddhima but she chose her life. It wasn't like my husband told her, 'Don't work in movies.' That's what she chose. Today, she wants to work, she is working. She wanted to devote her time to her husband, her daughter, that was her priority," she explained.
Rishi Kapoor's Parenting Style
Neetu also opened up about Rishi Kapoor's parenting style, revealing that he intentionally maintained a certain distance from his children because he believed a father should command respect and fear. "My husband wanted to keep that, 'I am the father, don't get too close to me, keep that distance.' So he never got friendly with Ranbir or Riddhima because they should have some fear," she said.
Recalling how the children reacted to Rishi's presence at home, she added, "They were scared. There was that kind of a fear. He wanted that."
