In the bustling city of Panaji, a young couple presents a picture of ordinary life to the world. Rakesh earns his living as a driver, while his wife, Shaina, works in tailoring. Their modest income places them among the many facing economic hardship in India. However, their most significant struggle remains a carefully guarded secret from prying neighbors and relatives: their HIV-positive status.
A Life Concealed: The Daily Reality of Stigma
The constant fear of discovery shapes their everyday existence. "We even hide our medicine bottles so guests don't know about our illness," reveals 22-year-old Shaina. This meticulous concealment is a necessary defense against the pervasive stigma surrounding HIV in their community. Their union itself is a testament to resilience, made possible by the NGO Zindagi, which has been facilitating matches for People Living with HIV (PLHIV) since 2005.
Shaina's journey with HIV began in childhood. She discovered her status at the tender age of 12 when her father passed away from AIDS. "When my mother and I together learnt that we had HIV, it felt as if the world had come to an end," she recounts. The diagnosis plunged her mother into a deep depression, burdened by guilt and anxiety for her daughter's future.
Building a Future on Mutual Understanding
Their wedding was a simple, low-key ceremony attended only by close friends and neighbors, a reflection of their limited means but boundless gratitude. "I bought a saree costing Rs 1,200, and the only gold I had was small gold earrings and a ring. My husband gave me a small mangalsutra," Shaina shares. The couple's mutual understanding runs deep. Having lost both his parents, Rakesh made no demands on Shaina's mother, who now works as a house help.
Their marriage operates on a unique set of principles, shaped by their shared health condition. "I know, if I give him tension, it will affect his health. He too is aware. We have a responsibility to take care of each other," Shaina explains. Both are on lifelong antiretroviral therapy (ART) and have systematized their treatment, even fixing a specific time to take their medication together. This shared responsibility has become the strongest bond in their relationship.
The Role of NGO Zindagi in Creating Hope
Mahesh Govekar, director of Zindagi, outlines the NGO's meticulous matchmaking process. Field workers conduct thorough background checks, with the candidate's HIV viral load being the most critical factor. "A match is suggested only if they are satisfied that the candidate fully complies with the ART regime and that his or her viral load is negligible," Govekar states. The organization currently has around a dozen youth registered and seeking life partners.
Despite their noble mission, challenges persist. Govekar notes that matchmaking often becomes difficult when families insist on rigid conditions regarding religion, educational qualifications, and other social criteria. Once a couple consents, however, Zindagi offers comprehensive support throughout the marriage process. Their work has even included helping a 45-year-old man find a partner and hosting a nikah in their office.
For Shaina and Rakesh, their shared illness has forged an unbreakable bond of empathy and care. "He treats my mother as his own, and since my mother doesn't have a son, she treats him like her son," Shaina says, a note of quiet triumph in her voice. In a world that often forces them to hide, they have found in each other a sanctuary of acceptance and love.
