Many Indian parents find themselves in a familiar, yet baffling, situation. Their child, who refuses vegetables or new dishes at the family dining table, happily cleans the plate at a friend's house. This puzzling behaviour, while frustrating, is remarkably common and rooted in psychology. Understanding the 'why' behind it is the first step for parents to foster a positive and healthier relationship with food for their children.
The Power of Peer Influence on Young Eaters
Children, especially in their formative years, are highly susceptible to social influence. At a friend's home, eating transforms from a daily chore into a shared social activity. Seeing peers enjoy certain foods without fuss encourages them to follow suit to fit in. The desire to be part of the group overrides personal hesitations, making them more willing to try unfamiliar items. This peer setting normalises the experience, turning a potential battle into an enjoyable, collective event.
How Environment Shapes Eating Behaviour
Home is a child's safe space, where they feel comfortable expressing dislikes or throwing tantrums. In contrast, a friend's house presents a novel environment with different rules, smells, and table settings. This novelty factor alone can make simple dishes seem exciting and special. The change in atmosphere and the instinct to be polite in an unfamiliar setting significantly increases a child's willingness to eat. What is routine at home becomes an adventure elsewhere, directly impacting their appetite and openness.
The Appetite-Killing Effect of Parental Pressure
Often unintentionally, parents can create pressure during meal times through coaxing, negotiations, or simply a watchful, expectant gaze. This pressure can backfire, turning dinner into a power struggle. At a friend's place, the expectations are lower and the child does not feel scrutinised. Freed from this watchful pressure, they respond more naturally to their own hunger cues. The relaxed, low-stakes atmosphere allows them to eat without anxiety, often resulting in them consuming more without a fuss.
What Parents Can Do Differently
Instead of worrying, parents can adapt by learning from these observations. Creating relaxed, positive family meal times is crucial. Eating together as a family, keeping conversations light and fun, and avoiding food-based negotiations can make a big difference. Parents can also make food more engaging by sharing stories about its origin or their own positive experiences with it. When children see their parents enjoying a variety of foods without pressure, their own resistance often diminishes. The goal is to replicate that peer-like, pressure-free enjoyment at the home dining table.
