Sixteen years ago, I visited the holy town of Vrindavan as a tourist, not a pilgrim. My faith was a casual backdrop of my upbringing, not a driving force. The trip was a cheerful family outing filled with sightseeing, shopping, and stories, far from a serious spiritual quest.
Vrindavan: A Mystical Carnival
Our family explored the wonders of Vrindavan with the curiosity of visitors. We walked through the enigmatic Nidhivan, half-listening to tales of Radha and Krishna's divine play. We enjoyed boating on the Yamuna, saw the Kaliya Naag temple, visited gaushalas, and even watched an elephant perform. We strolled on the sands of Raman Reti, blissfully unaware we were treading on what is considered the primeval playground of Lord Krishna. The town, with its vibrant chaos, deep devotion, and endless energy, felt like a mystical carnival—part holy, part human, and entirely alive.
The Heart of Devotion: Banke Bihari Temple
By evening, we reached our final destination: the Banke Bihari Temple. The 19th-century temple, built in a beautiful Rajasthani architectural style by the Goswami descendants of Swami Haridas, glowed pinkish in the evening light. Its walls, adorned with intricate carvings and vibrant paintings, depict Krishna's leelas from the Bhagavata Purana.
The central idol is unique and deeply revered. It is a 'tribhanga' murti, meaning it has three graceful bends, and is believed to represent both Radha and Krishna in a single form. Legend states that the idol appeared before the saint Haridas in this form. Historically, it was discovered near Nidhivan in the 16th century and was enshrined in the present temple built in 1862.
A Moment That Silenced the Mind
As we entered, we crossed a courtyard with black and white marble and approached a silver door. Behind it stood the dark idol with deep, captivating eyes. The moment I looked, I felt He was looking directly at me. Then, the curtain closed. When it opened again, something inexplicable happened.
My usually pragmatic, analytical mind went completely blank. I couldn't speak, think, or even recite my usual list of wishes. Unbidden tears streamed down my face. For ten to twelve minutes, I was engulfed by a wave of profound, tender love—vast and utterly beyond my understanding. As a cool-headed, unmarried woman in my 20s, this reaction was entirely foreign to me.
The silence that followed was shared. Stepping out of the sanctum, my family and I, including cousins who were not religious, were enveloped in a deep hush. Each confessed to feeling light-headed, emotionally stirred, and quieted, as if touched by the same ineffable force.
The Secret of the Curtain: Mercy and Protection
The unique practice of intermittently closing the curtain (jhanki) before the idol has several explanations rooted in devotion.
- Some believe Bihari Ji's gaze is so potent with divine enchantment that prolonged exposure could overwhelm a devotee. The curtain offers merciful glimpses, protecting the heart.
- Another beautiful belief is that the Lord is so tender-hearted that the overwhelming love (bhakti) from a devotee could enchant Him in return, risking that He might follow the devotee home.
- A third view is that the pujaris shield the Lord's childlike, playful essence from the nazar (evil eye), preserving His eternal charm.
My heart, forever marked by that first encounter, finds truth in the poetry of all these tales.
A Bond That Endures
Since that transformative day, I have returned to Banke Bihari Ji many times, navigating ever-growing crowds. Each visit replays that first magic: my heart softens, thoughts dissolve, and I stand before Him with folded hands, silent and utterly grateful. The joy of that single sight—the curtain parting to reveal His face—fills me with a love so complete that every worry fades. In that divine gaze, I find everything I need.
About the Author: Smita Mishra is the Editor of Times of India Lifestyle, Times Food, and Times Travel. A seasoned journalist with experience at leading media houses, she specializes in crafting compelling narratives at the intersection of culture, travel, and personal experience.
