The arranged marriage scene in India often features families and individuals setting expectations that seem disconnected from reality. A recent story shared by matchmaker and dating coach Oendrila Kapoor has ignited social media discussions for exactly this reason.
The Incident
On April 20, Kapoor recounted an interaction with a 37-year-old divorced man who approached her platform seeking a match. His requirements included a partner under 30 years old, a Brahmin by caste, with no past relationships—essentially no dating history—and a virgin. The demands were so extreme that she ultimately declined to work with him.
The Man's Background
What made the situation more surprising was his own profile. He is an IIT graduate and serves as a director at a billion-dollar company. However, his expectations appeared to be from a bygone era. Kapoor described how he confidently stated he wanted someone much younger, never married, never in a relationship, and from a specific caste.
He also insisted on a “zero body count.” When Kapoor questioned this, he attempted to justify it by citing research claiming women with more past partners are more likely to be unfaithful. Kapoor quickly pointed out the obvious flaw: by that logic, wouldn’t the same apply to him, given he had been married once?
Double Standards Revealed
His response did not help his case. He dismissed the point, saying it is “different for men,” which only reinforced the double standards and underlying misogyny in his thinking. Kapoor also noted that even if someone matching his criteria existed, she would likely come from a very traditional background—one that probably would not agree to marry a 37-year-old divorcee anyway. The man claimed he was already receiving such proposals but did not trust matrimonial platforms due to scams, which is why he wanted her help to verify profiles. That was the final straw. She refused to take him on as a client, bluntly telling him that he might actually be the problem—not the system—given how unrealistic and regressive his expectations were.
Online Reactions
The story quickly went viral. While some people defended the man, saying his “preferences” should be respected, many others were shocked. Comments ranged from calling out the audacity to pointing out the hypocrisy, with some even linking such attitudes to growing conversations about loneliness and dating struggles among men.
Broader Debate
Overall, the incident sparked a larger debate about double standards, outdated expectations, and what people think they are entitled to in modern relationships. It highlights the persistent challenges in the arranged marriage landscape, where regressive norms often clash with contemporary values.
