For Sindhu Vee, life took a dramatic turn from the high-pressure trading desks of London's investment banking world to the intimate, often terrifying, spotlight of a comedy stage. This profound transformation began after the birth of her first child, when she stepped away from her corporate career to embrace life as a stay-at-home mother. What followed was a period she describes as a painful "crack-up," a severe loss of identity that resonates with countless Indian mothers who have paused their professional lives.
The Reinvention: Finding a Voice on Stage
Her salvation arrived unexpectedly at a modest comedy workshop that turned into an open-mic night. There, Sindhu discovered a latent talent for making people laugh. This discovery marked the beginning of a new chapter, leading her to become a celebrated stand-up comedian, writer, and actor. In a candid conversation, she walked through the stages of this reinvention and shared insights on maintaining her children's connection to their Indian roots while living in the UK.
Addressing the common struggle of mothers who have left careers, Sindhu offers hard-won advice. She emphasises that feeling lost is not a permanent state and that seeking help is crucial. "Shame, guilt, and regret live in the dark of secrets and they will keep you stuck," she states. She points to a cultural tendency among Indians to tie self-worth entirely to achievements and roles like being a 'good' wife or mother. Asking questions like 'Who am I outside these roles?' can feel alien but is essential for self-discovery.
Parenting at the Crossroads of Cultures
Raising three children in an Indian-Danish household in Britain presents a unique set of challenges. Sindhu navigates this not with a rigid cultural map, but through mutual respect with her husband and a focus on core values. She has consciously retained certain Indian parenting practices while letting others go.
One tradition she keeps alive is the classic Indian mom warning: "agar xyz nahin kara, toh dekh lena mujhse bura koi nahin hoga." However, she has consciously discarded the intense pressure for academic excellence, particularly in mathematics, a move she admits was difficult for her Tamil Brahmin upbringing.
The comedian humorously notes that the "robust, healthy, high-quality parental discipline" common in many Indian childhoods would be considered illegal in the West. While she doesn't wish to replicate the extremes, she admires her mother's unwavering confidence in her disciplinary decisions.
Keeping Roots Alive Across Continents
Ensuring her children feel connected to their Indian heritage is a priority. The family cooks Indian food, celebrates festivals, and Sindhu's parents were deeply involved in their lives. She spoke a mix of Hindi and English to her kids and taught them texts like the Hanuman Chalisa. "I don't think our household could have had more India in it unless both parents were Indian," she asserts. Her children, she believes, fluidly identify as Indian, British, and Danish.
Her family is a rich source of material for her comedy, but she draws a line. Jokes are exaggerations of the "experience" of parenting or marriage, not the literal truth. The easiest targets, she finds, are their dogs—"They never complain."
Wisdom Forged from Loss and Laughter
Experiencing the profound loss of her parents and sister has deeply shaped her perspective on parenting. It has softened her, reinforcing the desire for her children to know she is always there for them, no matter what. This aligns with the most treasured piece of wisdom from her mother: to be grateful for the life given and to live it fully.
Conversely, she actively discourages the pervasive worry of "Log kya bolenge" (what will people say), which she considers nonsense. For Sindhu, balance as a working mother is about prioritising and being fully present in whichever role she is fulfilling at the moment, trusting that it is enough.
When asked if she'd encourage her children to pursue comedy, her pragmatic, desi side emerges: Sure, but they must get a degree in something to fall back on first. "Optionality and a safety net is basic common sense," she concludes, blending ancestral wisdom with the realities of a modern, global life.
