For many parents in India, a child's constant fidgeting, inability to sit still, or impulsive actions are often mistaken for simple naughtiness or a lack of discipline. However, when a child has Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), this behaviour has a deeper, biological root. It stems from a struggle with the brain's executive functions, where what looks like excessive energy is often an internal motor the child hasn't learned to pause. Understanding this 'why' is the first crucial step towards fostering a calmer, more supportive home.
Decoding Hyperactivity: It's More Than Just High Energy
ADHD is a neurodevelopmental condition that impacts the brain's 'command centre.' While all children are active, a child with hyperactive-type ADHD displays symptoms that are significantly more intense and persistent than what is typical for their age. Key signs include constant fidgeting or squirming, an inability to remain seated when expected, frequently interrupting others or blurting out answers, acting without considering consequences, and experiencing quick tempers or emotional meltdowns when frustrated.
The core challenge for parents is shifting from a reactive to a proactive parenting approach. Instead of constantly responding to behaviours, the goal is to structure the environment to prevent overwhelm and teach essential coping skills.
Building Structure and Channeling Energy
All children benefit from routine, but for a child with ADHD, structure is non-negotiable. They often struggle to regulate their internal sense of time and transitions. Creating a visual schedule using charts or pictures to outline the daily routine—wake-up, breakfast, school, homework, play—provides much-needed predictability.
Since shifting from one activity to another is particularly hard, give clear warnings at 10, 5, and 2 minutes before a change. Crucially, hyperactivity requires constructive outlets, not just commands to 'stop.'
- Engage them in high-movement activities like basketball, soccer, or martial arts to work out restless energy.
- Incorporate 'Brain Breaks' during homework, allowing for a 5-minute movement break after every 20 minutes of focused sitting.
- Provide sensory tools like stress balls or wobble cushions for times when they must stay seated, such as during family dinner.
Effective Communication and Building Connection
The ADHD brain responds powerfully to immediate feedback. Long-term rewards often fail, so instant and specific praise works best. Instead of a generic 'Good job,' try, 'I love how you waited patiently for your turn to speak.' Similarly, if a rule is broken, the consequence should follow immediately so the child can clearly connect action and result.
Avoid constant correction, as it can erode self-esteem. Dedicate 10–15 minutes daily for 'Special Time,' where the child chooses the activity and you follow their lead without commands or corrections. This strengthens your bond and reduces attention-seeking negative behaviours.
Teaching Self-Advocacy and Collaborating for Success
The ultimate goal is to equip the child with self-advocacy and coping mechanisms. Celebrate their inherent strengths—creativity, spontaneity, and energy—and find 'success zones' like art, music, or sports where they can excel.
Teach them practical tools like the 'STOP, THINK, DO' method to pause before acting impulsively. Furthermore, ensure teachers are aware of the diagnosis and collaborate with them to provide accommodations, such as preferential seating away from distractions or extra time for tasks.
Parenting a child with ADHD is demanding, acknowledges Nuwaira Pasha, Director of The One School. It requires patience, tailored strategies, and a focus on understanding the unique wiring of the ADHD brain to guide children toward managing their world more effectively.
