Amit Kumar Dubey: The Househusband Redefining Gender Roles in Bihar
He is a househusband, and he proudly calls himself one. Amit Kumar Dubey from Champaran, Motihari, Bihar, does not work outside the home. Instead, he dedicates himself full-time to managing his household. From cooking and cleaning to looking after his daughter and preparing meals for his working wife, Amit has redefined the role of men in marriage in a profound way.
A Natural Choice
When The Times of India reached out to him for an interview, Amit was genuinely surprised. He wondered what was so unique about his actions. In his view, managing the home when one's partner is working is a natural and logical step. Amit chose a path that many men might find unthinkable: he gave up his job so that his wife could continue hers. He shares that his marriage began as a love match but eventually became arranged, with his wife setting one condition—she would marry only if her family agreed. They did, and the couple tied the knot in December 2015.
Career Sacrifices for Family
Amit holds a diploma in mechanical engineering and was previously employed at a pharmaceutical company in Baddi, Himachal Pradesh. However, family circumstances prevented him from returning to his job. His wife needed support during a difficult phase, and he did not want to abandon her. “Some situations happened in the family, and I could not go back to join my job. My wife needed support, and I couldn’t leave her at that time. She is very gentle and was handling a lot on her family front. I have never spoken about these things to anyone before,” he explains.
Later, when his wife was transferred to Kolkata for a bank clerk position, Amit followed and found work there. But a few months later, they had to return home after his wife suffered a miscarriage and became very weak. Amit again chose to stay by her side, as his private job would not have granted extended leave.
Embracing Full-Time Homemaking
When their daughter was born, Amit made the definitive decision to become a full-time homemaker. With his wife struggling to balance a government job and childcare, he stepped in without hesitation. Does he have any regrets? “Yes, sometimes when I am alone, I worry about my family. My parents and younger brothers have never questioned my decision and have always supported me. But as the eldest son, I feel I should be fulfilling my responsibilities toward them. That thought troubles me at times,” he admits.
When asked if his wife expects him to work, he says, “She has never said anything. We have a perfect understanding.” Amit becomes emotional while speaking about his mother, noting that as the eldest child in a family with no sisters, he naturally helped with household chores, and now he does the same for his wife.
Daily Life and Inspirational Impact
Amit spends his days cooking for his wife and daughter, cleaning, helping with homework, and managing all other household tasks. He feels guilty about hiring help, believing that since he is not working outside, he must contribute as much as possible at home. Recently, he started an Instagram page to share his journey, which has garnered overwhelming support. “I had almost planned a food business in my free time when the idea of starting an Instagram page occurred to me, and I am so overwhelmed by the love that I am getting! There are so many people who validate what I am doing, and this is so overwhelming,” says Amit.
Amit is truly an inspiration. He chose partnership over pride and responsibility over social expectations. Despite being a mechanical engineer, he stepped away from his career to support his wife and raise their daughter, without feeling insecure about his role. He proves that true strength in a marriage lies in mutual support, understanding, and breaking stereotypes. By embracing homemaking with dignity, he sets an example for men and women alike, showing that caring for family is not about gender—it’s about commitment and love.
