The return of Cristiano Ronaldo to Manchester United from Juventus in 2021 was met with immense excitement, heightened by Peter Drury's poetic commentary: "Madeira, Manchester, Madrid, Turin and Manchester again. Wreathed in red. Restored to this great gallery of the game. A walking work of art. Vintage. Beyond valuation, beyond forgery or imitation. 18 years since that trembling teenager of touch and tease, first tiptoed on this storied stage; Now in his immaculate maturity; CR7 - Reunited." However, as often happens with overly optimistic expectations, the situation soon turned into a Voltairean character. It began promisingly, but it quickly became clear that Ronaldo's presence created an unbalanced squad, leading to Ole Gunnar Solskjaer's dismissal and Ronaldo's contract termination after a Roy Keane-esque interview with Piers Morgan.
Ronaldo's Decline on the Pitch
A few years later, Ronaldo is seen wandering around the penalty box more like a sheep than the GOAT his fans believe him to be. He had two shots, and as Thierry Henry pointed out, it would have been a simple tap-in for Bruno Fernandes behind him if he had let the ball run. Ronaldo now spends most of his time in offside positions, making no significant contribution to his team's play. The only benefit, according to Wayne Rooney, is that it allows others to run into space. However, it is painful to watch for those who saw his Manchester United debut in 2004 against Bolton Wanderers—the trembling teenager whose influence has shrunk from the entire pitch to just the opponent's penalty box.
In the 1-1 draw against the Democratic Republic of Congo, it was evident that Father Time has left his mark. Perhaps Portugal should make the tough decision and retire the GOAT. In Indian politics, there is a term called Margdarshak Mandal, referring to a group of elderly councilmen whose role is to guide the party. It is a polite way of moving people upstairs, and Margdarshak literally means one who shows the light. This might be the best role for Ronaldo, who was also off the pitch when Portugal last won a major trophy: Euro 2016, not the cobbled-together Nations League. If they don't act, they might lose their best chance to win the World Cup.
Thomas Tuchel's Impact on England
There was significant concern when Thomas Tuchel was appointed manager of the Three Lions, with many patriotic Englishmen questioning if all British managers were unavailable, conveniently forgetting that the Royal family was once called Saxe-Coburg and Gotha and changed its name to Windsor during World War I to shed German roots. Some even joked that Tuchel was a Dhurandhar-style spy picked to sabotage the English team after leaving talented players like Phil Foden, Cole Palmer, Trent Alexander-Arnold, and Harry Maguire at home. While England performed better in international tournaments under Gareth Southgate, football's almost Cromwell, under Tuchel, England delivered one of their best performances in memory against Croatia, winning 4-2 against Modric and company, who seem to have represented Vatreni since independence.
More often than not, England have appeared catatonic even with Premier League superstars, so it was surprising to see them play without fear, not letting their shoulders drop after Croatia equalized twice. Harry Kane continued his remarkable form, Jude Bellingham scored a stunning goal without looking weighed down by the entire island's expectations, and even Rashford scored a delightful goal and celebrated as if he had just fed a hungry child. After the match, Kane revealed that their second-half performance was due to a reinvigorating Tuchel speech, in which he told the players to "take the shackles off" and show the world who they were. It is very early in the tournament to talk about football coming home, but if Tuchel leads England to a World Cup, will a German get a knighthood?
Other Matches and Developments
In another group game, Ghana struggled to get past Panama, with the main talking point being fans booing hydration breaks rather than anything on the field. While a Partey-less Ghana scored in the 95th minute, neither England nor Croatia will be trembling at facing either team. Meanwhile, Colombia's old guard led them to a comfortable 3-1 win over Uzbekistan, with Diaz playing with the zeal of a man high on the country's greatest export. His pass to Daniel Munoz was impossible to defend, as was Munoz's flying finish, which was the goal of the tournament so far. Interestingly, Munoz is from Amalfi, a town of only 30,000 people where a picture of the Royal Bengal Tiger is prominently displayed, with the legend that the tiger devoured thousands of cattle before five men hunted it down. Ironically, it wasn't a tiger but an American jaguar, but the legend persisted.
Upcoming matches do not feature teams that might trouble bookmakers about lifting the trophy, but it will still be interesting to see how Czechia handles South Africa as both look to put their first defeats behind them. As pointed out by The Athletic, South Africa are the second-shortest team at the tournament while Czechia are the fifth-tallest, which could make set-pieces crucial. In Group B, Switzerland takes on Bosnia and Herzegovina, with the former now viewed as a reliable watch from that part of the world, though they will still be smarting about letting Qatar score an equalizer. Bosnia are no pushovers, and with their talisman Edin Dzeko on the verge of a return, they might be a fly in the fondue for the Swiss.
Then there is Canada vs Qatar. The oil-rich nation has already bettered their 2022 record by grabbing a point against Switzerland, but the smart money is still on the co-hosts Canada to win, particularly if their star player Alphonso Davies returns. Finally, one of the most evenly matched games will be Mexico vs South Korea. The former have home advantage; the latter are Asia's best-performing team in a World Cup and have genuine proven stars. Off the pitch, Mexicans have embraced South Korea with open arms, chanting: "Coreano, hermano ya eres Mexicano (Korean, brother, you are Mexican now)." That bonhomie dates back to 2018, when South Korea beat defending champions Germany to help Mexico qualify. After the first round of games, we also have a hotly contested race for the Golden Boot, with Messi leading with three goals, while Erling Haaland, Kylian Mbappe, Harry Kane, Folarin Balogun, Kai Havertz, Yasin Ayari, and Elijah Just are all tied on two goals.
Off the pitch, there have been numerous talking points, including fans coming up with rather unparliamentary chants about Donald Trump, none of which are publishable. Boston, which has always had an Irish heart, has fallen in love with the Tartan Army from Scotland, whose fans drank the city dry. The Portugal vs Congo match had a surprising desi connection: Congo's Samuel Moutoussamy's father is from Tamil Nadu, while Portuguese keeper Diogo Costa's grandfather is from Goa, meaning this might be the first match where two players with desi connections were on the pitch together. FIFA is facing repeated questions about its ticketing policy, with visibly empty stadiums which Gianni Infantino insists are full, which perhaps explains why iShowSpeed can be seen at every stadium at the same time. All said and done, to quote Robert Frost, it has just been one week, and there are miles to go before we sleep. Quite literally.
