In urban households across India, a new trend is reshaping childhood. Driven by an intense fear of their children falling behind, parents are meticulously filling every spare minute with structured activities, from sports to arts, creating a generation of overscheduled youngsters.
The Packed Schedule: A Tale of Two Cities
The story of Srishti, a 10-year-old from South Delhi, is emblematic of this shift. Her evenings are a relentless rotation of gymnastics, table tennis, and swimming classes, with homework squeezed in between. Her mother, Kaveri Khatri, watches with concern as her daughter pushes herself relentlessly, especially after failing to qualify for an inter-school swimming competition last year. Despite worrying about the stress, Khatri admits she is too scared to pull Srishti out of any class, fearing she will be "left behind" by her peers.
This scenario is being replicated in homes from Delhi to Gurgaon and Noida. Parents are ferrying their children from one class to another, motivated less by genuine interest and more by the anxiety of keeping up with the neighbours. Experts have labelled this phenomenon "FOMO parenting" – where decisions are fueled by the fear of missing out on what others are doing. The pressure is amplified by social media, where showcasing a child's multifaceted achievements has become a form of grandstanding.
"When I hear other parents talk about how busy their kids are, I feel I'm doing my child a disservice by not enrolling him in more," confesses Jagriti Khanna, mother to a 12-year-old. This sentiment captures the collective anxiety driving the trend.
The Quest to Become a 'Jack of All Trades'
The era of one post-school activity or casual playtime is fading. Today, the ambition is to mold an all-rounder or a 'jack of all trades'. This parental FOMO is often internalized by the children themselves, who then seek to match or surpass their friends. Anuj Srivastava's son, already engaged in chess, guitar, and cricket, now wants art classes because he feels his drawing skills don't measure up to his peers'.
This race, however, carries a significant financial burden. Myra Khanna from Gurgaon spends up to Rs 22,000 a month on robotics and chess classes for her sons, on top of weekly cricket coaching. Niche hobbies demand even more. Anil Jain from Noida pays a substantial sum for his two daughters' horse-riding lessons, a commitment he made after they insisted, citing that most of their friends were doing it. Their neighbours, he notes, spend exorbitantly on golf lessons for their child.
The Risk of 'Master of None' and Child Burnout
In the frantic rush from piano to badminton, children often end up mastering none. Sia Tandon's daughter attended piano classes for three years before abruptly quitting to take up badminton. Tandon now regrets the time, money, and effort invested, wondering how much her daughter even remembers. She observes that some parents actively scout what other children are learning just to enrol their own, turning parenting into an unconscious competition.
Dr. Roma Kumar, a senior psychologist at Sir Ganga Ram Hospital, explains that children build their own world of peer pressure based on their surroundings. "They assume everything is hunky dory and decide they need to learn and excel in everything," she says. Parents, under pressure to boast about achievements, unknowingly fuel this by making comparisons.
The consequences extend beyond finances. Experts warn of early burnout in children as young as 10-12 years, stemming from being pushed beyond reasonable limits. The constant pressure from both school and home can take a severe toll on a child's mental and physical health.
Finding Balance: A Path Forward
Amidst this frenzy, voices of caution are emerging. Kaveri Khatri advises her children not to engage in anything they cannot handle physically or mentally. Dr. Kumar strongly cautions against over-scheduling and advocates for meaningful conversations with children to understand their true passions. "Kids need to know their mind doesn't always have to be active. It is okay to relax at times," she emphasizes, even citing the example of a three-year-old complaining of boredom as a sign of a need for unstructured time.
The narrative unfolding in Indian metros is a complex one, where parental love and ambition intersect with social competition and fear. The challenge lies in nurturing a child's potential without succumbing to the pressure that turns enrichment into exhaustion, and childhood into a relentless race.
